Soul Help

subversive soul

(disruptive, subverting an established system)

Our subversive Savior used a brilliant weapon against the status quo: 

Love.

On Holy Thursday (or Maundy Thursday, maundy – Latin for mandate = commandment) the night before his death, Jesus gave a new commandment. (John 13:34,35) Following that command to love one another would become what distinguished His people from others.  The next day Love cut piercingly through the spit-filled mockery and wrenching injustice.  It threw His enemies off.  They never saw that coming.  Love is subversive at times.

Up is down.  Giving is receiving. Life is death. Being is becoming.

So many paradoxes in this life of faith!  So, we too have to be subversive.  The established system we seek to subvert is our propensity to self-centeredness; the idea that, life is about us, all about how I think it should be. When full life really comes from the One who designed us.  So, subverting that mindset means looking honestly at me and my status quo.

I think we’d all agree that sin is a problem for us.  And more so when we think it’s not.  We’ve seen way too many leaders living as if they were above the ways of God and losing their way.  How easily we can lose our way.  In the book of Hebrews it’s referred to as hardness of heart, or dullness of ears, immature, untrained and unaccustomed to God’s Word.

“The moment we formulate our doctrines, draw up our moral codes and throw ourselves into a life of ministry apart from a continuous re-immersion in the [gospel] story itself, we walk right out of the presence and activity of God and set up our own shop.” E Peterson Subversive Spirituality

We’re talking about inner work here, matters of the invisible. Often, we’re too content with just the outward things in our lives:

“…we must draw boundaries where they will help us. But it’s dangerous to imagine they will reform us, protect us from moral decay, or eradicate the true source of sin. We can’t let down our guard. Sin begins in our own hearts and minds, and the most effective protections are the ministry of the Holy Spirit and equal, open relationships with brothers and sisters in Christ.”  Amy Simpson 

What in your soul needs that subversive love? 

RH Barton speaking of R Mulholland’s Invitation to a Journey says the soul’s “journey toward Christlikeness and abandonment to God begins by exposing conscious sins and omissions and culminates in a greater awareness of the deep-seated attitudes and inner orientations of our being out of which our behavior patterns flow. Here God deals primarily with our “trust structures” especially those deep inner postures…that do not rely on God but on self for our well-being.”

Soul Help

soul swing

There’s something about a swing that makes you take time to ponder….

8 ½ ideas for inner growth

  1. Stop
  2. Look
  3. Listen
  4. Hear
  5. Feel
  6. Grieve
  7. Release
  8. Receive

½ .  Find your next step – what is it?     ___________________________

Psalm 4:4 “…reflect in your heart and be still. Selah”

Soul Help

Soul misses

After my father-in-law’s memorial service, I’m contemplating the inevitable misses in life, the cries for help, the absences at crucial junctures, the lack of voice – what I wish I would’ve noticed, where I wish I would have been, when I wish I could have heard another or held my tongue.  How drowning that can be!  …yet how redeeming to know God is orchestrating me.

Now that I know, I go

To places in the past I should have been, noticing faces that needed a touch, traces of sorrow unheeded, feelings ungreeted, unspoken questions seeded

To grow into ogres of thought that overshadow the truth that I sought, the love I fought for you.

Heaves of hind-sighted regrets, finding way for an undiscovered voice;

“It’s not as it should have been,” yet spliced

With reaches both ways, clarity and haze

Stillness of time bidding me stay; I cannot dwell in the powerful array

that holds in its mire.  So, I fight for you & me, as I see in new light what is becoming.

“We do not grieve as those without hope…” 1 Thess. 4:13

What “miss” in your past tries to hold you in its mire?

Soul Help

Soul Assault

 

“You’re…a mirage, an oasis in the distance and then nothing…”

Jeremiah to God (Jer. 15:18)

  About 600 years BC the Israelites had gone through all the motions of “religion” and were living just like the other nations, with all their pagan practices including sacrificing their children to another god. Reform had come but was only skin deep.  God had pleadingly given His people so many chances to turn.

In a most wrenching treatise of offense, God lets Jeremiah know He must stop the carnage, the entitlement, the flippancy.  (Jere. 2)  Jeremiah holds the warning before them and they scoff, they bully, they claim, “God is with us.”  And Jerusalem had no idea what was coming.

Jeremiah is done.  Angry, hurt and lonely.  No one listens.  He’s had so much come against him; bombarded with one thing after another.  You almost expect him to storm out and quit. But what does he do?

He comes bare and raw to the Lord.  He speaks his mind and to me it feels irreverent and accusatory.  He’s SO honest.  He brings all the reality, the mess, the sheer emotion without hiding or minimizing any of it.  And God is glad that he does. But he doesn’t leave him there.

“Prayer is a constant re-establishment of our priorities.”

Run with Horses, E Peterson, p.103

Our lives and circumstances throw all kinds of wrenches in our thinking, planning and dreaming.  God hears Jeremiah out; doesn’t squelch his outcry.  Perhaps He’s been waiting for the truth to come out, to be faced and owned. That’s when you get to the real core beliefs, the real wrestling, where names are changed.  We have to get there, but sometimes it takes years.

God’s patient response is not pandering because he knows what staying with those kinds of volatile emotions does to a person.  He’s out for our good.  He basically says, “I’m glad you came to Me.  I feel the same rejection and pain. This is heart wrenching.  I hear you and know how difficult it is.  But I also strengthen you for it. My plan is coming about. So, let’s return to your priorities… Your goal is not that they follow you, but you follow Me.  Return to Me.  (Jere. 15:19)

Our rock bottom goal is following our God.  Sometimes emotions, mild or fierce, are windows into what’s going on in us that’s unseen or maybe even unconscious.

  Have you let God in on your raw emotion to re-establish your priorities?  

Soul Help

Soul Slump?

January lends itself to soul slumps, it seems.  The inevitable overwhelm of things that need
to happen, and the underwhelm of motivation to make a move, or to prioritize,
all while wondering if any of it really matters.  We are funny creatures with our highs and
lows, our beauty and brutality, our needed-ness and our neediness. 

I remember someone profoundly saying in these situations, “Just do the next thing.”  And as obvious as that seems, it’s actually helpful as the fleeting flurry of festivities screeches into the jolting juncture of January.  (We just celebrated three of our kids’ weddings in the last 6 months, plus the holidays. Now that’s a jolting juncture!) 

So, my “Do the next thing(s)” today were

  • laundry, and being thankful for washer and drying rack.
  • answering a few important emails, and being thankful I can contribute to someone’s life in a positive way.
  • taking some alone moments to think, pray and acknowledge my soul slump and receive grace, wisdom and energy from above.

“…strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience; joyously giving thanks…”  Col. 1:11

And I slowly begin to straighten, my gaze turning upward.

Let yourself be where you are.  Then you can move from there.  Instead of begrudging the excess belly (or whatever your excess was), be glad you celebrated well and enjoyed it.  There’s a time for feasting!  And a time for getting back to enjoying temperance.

Soul Help

Soul Source

 

“…the things on earth stand next to Him like a candle to the sun! 

What compares to His great love?  Behold his holy Son…

The Word became a man that my soul should know its Savior. 

…Salvation is in his blood, Jesus Messiah!” 

Hillsong – “Behold” (Then sings my soul)

 

 

This piercing song deeply affected my spirit, skillfully ushering into my inner being living truth that transforms thoughts and intentions: God’s Spirit to my spirit and from there to my soul (mind, will, emotions) massaging, informing and releasing into the brain where the neuro stuff happens.  That’s where the actual result of what comes into my spirit flows out, from soul to brain to life.

 

Ephesians 4:23 “be renewed in the spirit of your mind…”  The spirit of your mind!? 

 

If THE Spirit is the chief informant for our spirit, we are on a good path.  If our spirits don’t have time or ears to be informed or sourced, we risk the outcome of a driven, overstressed lifestyle that denies the danger of overdoing our fight/flight/freeze hormones. We could eventually lose the ability to readily produce our well-being hormones.  So much so, that over time, a brain glutted with adrenaline overdose will seek anything that will give it a shot of a comfort hormone, which at that point will only come with greater risks and extremes.  Thus, the addictions, thrill seeking and phobias that are so rampant among us.  Our souls are being informed by our driven-ness rather than by our Designer.

 

My spirit was inadvertently informed by a song full of His Word and my mind is renewed, my heart is courageous to honor Him as I chose to believe Him today. My brain follows suit and the synapses trigger the neurons to carve a deeper path to positive action.  I face my circumstances with more freedom, expanded ideas, compassion and hope.

 

I am being renewed in the spirit of my mind!

 

How is your spirit being informed, so that your soul is sourced with truth and grace for real living?

 

 

Ideas from The Anxiety Cure, Dr. A. Hart

Soul Growth

Soul Challenge

 

My husband & I do a bit of an exercise regime most weekdays and during one online session the instructor said

“I want you to want to challenge yourself.”

 

In my early morning stupor, trying to just get through it, I was awakened to the thought, “Do I want to challenge myself?”  Heretofore sprung upon me the annoying realization that I would really rather not right now, thank you.  I’ll just float on through this workout.

 

Then my “committee of selves” quickly perked up and said “Now wait, who’s in charge here, the body or the will?”  And my inner self, trying not to listen then realized, I’m going to drift into something I do not want to be if I don’t stand up and make a choice here.  So, with the Spirit’s nudge and my husband’s eagerness, I took the challenge to challenge myself and did a hard workout.  I hadn’t been that sore in a while. 

 

And what about our souls?  Do we want to want to challenge our soul to growth?  It is much easier to drift and go on yesterday’s learnings and achievements.  But there’s new learning, challenges and dangers today; especially in our tumultuous world!  The Apostle Peter urged us to “Grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord…”  after saying, “be on your guard so that you are not carried away…” 2 Peter 3:17,18

Take a few moments to sit and ponder.

 

How are you growing in grace?

 

Grace toward yourself recognizing your frailty and allowing God to come into your frailty and transform.  Not trying to make yourself better for him.  That won’t work.

 

Grace toward others you are struggling with, to understand them, see their perspective, pray for them, forgive them and find a helpful place and time to listen and dialog.

 

How are you growing in knowledge of God?

 

Is He still #1?  How does your life show that?  “If anyone loves Me he will keep my Word.”  John 14:23

 

Where are your heart’s affections?   This takes some thought…

 

He longs to expand us and deepen us.  We need His power to even be able to receive the kind of love He has for us…today.

 

“So take diligent heed to yourselves to love the Lord your God.” Joshua 23:11

 

(Loving Him means receiving His love first.)

Soul Awe

Not Enough Pause

 

                                                                                                                                photo-Ariana Scott

“…meditate upon all his wondrous works” Ps. 105:2

 

Traveling…on the road again, it’s easy to put things on hold, to get out of the habit of pausing.  Because of

 

  • wonderful people to meet with
  • wanting to be present with them
  • not wanting to wear out our welcome where we’re staying
  • hearing of and carrying heavy burdens along with family and friends
  • recognizing in the flurry my own dullness to hear and slowness to love
  • moments of awkwardness
  • the news from colleagues of conflicts within and dangers without
  • precious celebrations with fascinating people
  • awe at our God’s creation in nature and people, ideas and adventures

 

Somehow, we’ve got to fit in pause.

 

A pause where you stop, look and listen; where you take in the wonder, the beauty, the transcendence of life that reminds you that this life is not about this life. It’s about something much bigger. The vast depths and heights of God’s love and provision that has infiltrated our souls. So, we pause and wonder and take in.  And maybe it will inform us, change us, move us to new strength, wisdom and grace.  Thank you to all who are pausing with us.  For putting your lives on pause and celebrating God’s beauty and design in creation and relationship.  His beauty in the union of David and Rachel, and later this month Kelvin and Stephanie and in December Luke and Megan!  We’re also celebrating Brad and Ariana’s 5 sweet years and Dan and my 35 adventurous and transoceanic years!  Wow.

 

We are pursued by His goodness and mercy.  We are realigned at the core of our being.

 

“God does great things beyond our understanding…”  Job 37:5

 

 

Soul Help, Soul Warning

Soul Vapor

“I could try to outrun the sun with my superhuman striving. I could try to hide in the dark with my subhuman shame.” Leeana Tankersley

 

What will it take to stop us?  To get us to think about what we’re thinking about; to grasp what we’ve been given?  Our rush to activity or our search for hiding places can rule us.

A few years back, I was jogging past a graveyard on a lazy summer morning thinking about what the day held, I tried to decipher what was worth worrying about.  The morning was a bit misty and the graves to my left quite obtrusive on a hill facing me, staring. As I passed by, I imagined I was being watched, examined and spoken to.  It was an alarming thought.  What might they say?!  How many of those buried people even had the privilege to take time to jog when they were alive?  How did they spend their lives and were they glad?  What would they do differently if they could?  What would they say to me?

 

I’m compelled to write on their behalf.  To shout what they might say.  We’ll be on that hill under the ground in a few short years!  I’m compelled to write for the ones who will join us on this planet; for my future grandkids. That they would see the end from the beginning, embrace it and live it wisely.

 

Can we ever get our heads around the idea that our lives are so short?!  Those feelings of, “where did that month go, or that week of vacation?” When I want to suspend the moments, the talks, the sweet looks, the lingering, the dialog.  I want to go back and say something else or not say it.  I want a chance to embrace more of what’s going on and enter in or bow out more gracefully.  There’s always too much for us to take in in a day.  That’s the vapor…it’s there, you hardly see it, and then it’s gone. That’s us.

 

Our hearts get fickle, anxious, greedy, tangled and weighed down…and we just don’t really believe that the next life is much more important.  You know, if you want to know what you really believe (not what you say you believe) look at what you’re living for; what you’re most anxious about; what you think about most. And walah! you’re busted.

 

We need to “escape into the truth”! (Alexander Chee) Away from the whirling dervish of life and give attention to the unseen parts of our being to reorient ourselves.

 

How can you plan your escape into truth; so that the rest of your earthly vapor prepares you for what will last forever?

It’s a matter of time.  Stop now, find a space and place to ponder your vapor. (James 4)

It’s a matter of time, until your life dispels into the beyond.

Then what will you say to the one jogging flippantly past your grave?!